Saw this on Facebook, decided to preserve it forever.
Rules of the Lab
- If an experiment works, something has gone wrong.
- When you don’t know what you’re doing, do it neatly.
- Experiments must be reproducible, they should fail the same way each time.
- First draw your curves, then plot your data.
- Experience is directly proportional to equipment ruined.
- Always keep a record of your data. It indicates that you have been working.
- To do a lab really well, have your report done well in advance.
- If you can’t get the answer in the usual manner, start at the answer and derive the question.
- In case of doubt, make it sound convincing.
- Do not believe in miracles–rely on them.
- Team work is essential; it allows you to blame someone else.
- All unmarked beakers contain fast-acting, extremely toxic poisons.
- No experiment is a complete failure. At least it can serve as a negative example.
- Any delicate and expensive piece of glassware will break before any use can be made of it.